As I cast my pearls before you
As I pour my blood, sweat, and tears into this pen It dawns on me
What the fuck am I doing This is like sex with a rubber doll Like shooting blanks This LIKE button has become our god The master of our morning Oh my God And to get a comment Just one fucking good comment Have I lost my mind casting my pearls before swine This has become like one weird twisted kind of digital sex Some sick way to get my jollies I run to the computer early to check my lines To see if any fish have bitten OMG There are thirty-one worlds and two messages WTF is wrong with me It is as if this thing This electronic fucking monster has consumed me Taking over my mind, body, soul, spirit It calls out to me It beckons me I have become one with this thing – this monster It has taken me over at home, at work, in the car In the theater, at church On the fucking toilet, in bed I can't even have a moment to myself There it is staring at me My god I even had sex with it OMG My jizz my precious jizz Am I losing my mind It has me by the balls lock, stock, and barrel It consumes me eighteen hours a day And what do I get in return Not a fucking thing They control us Our every move They watch us They know when we come into the room When we touch them They wait for our fingers to press upon them They sense our breath, our motion OMG I'm losing it The car has one The refrigerator, the stove, my watch, the television The game boy, this boy, that boy OH BOY OH FUCK OMG NOW I'M THINKING WILL THEY HIT THE LIKE BUTTON ON THIS ONE OMG HELP
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